7 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Starting Therapy: A Guide to Your Healing Journey
If you’ve landed here because you’re wanting to start therapy, give yourself a pat on the back! To choose to do the work and recognize that you need support along the way is a courageous step toward living the life that you want for yourself. At the same time, it’s important to ensure that you are ready for the ride. Having a moment of introspection could be extremely beneficial in ensuring that this journey of self-discovery and healing is a meaningful and transformative experience. Grab and pen and let’s get to exploring the 7 essential questions that I believe will help you prepare to take the next step towards getting into therapy and making it worthwhile.
1. How honest am I willing to be throughout this process?
If you aren’t willing to say what’s really going on in your world, therapy will never be helpful. Honesty truly is the best policy when it comes to transforming into the person you truly want to be. I get it, you don’t want to be judged or shamed for what you’re experiencing and know that the best therapist for you, would ensure that you have a safe space to share your story that offers you care and genuine connection. Reflect on your willingness to open up and share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with your therapist. The more transparent you are, the more impact therapy can have on your life.
2. Am I acknowledging what is happening in my life at this current time?
When they said acceptance is the first step, they were on to something. Acknowledging your current reality is a crucial step in the therapeutic journey. Your therapist cannot help you if your response to everything is “it’s fine” or “good.” Reflect on your willingness to face and accept it all - the challenges, successes, and uncertainties in your life. This awareness helps to build the foundation for meaningful discussions in therapy and it also gets you closer to the version of you, you desire to be.
3. Am I motivated to make a change?
Motivation is the driving force behind any transformation. How motivated do you feel to address the thoughts, feelings and actions that are preventing you from being where you want to be. Assess your level of motivation to make positive changes in your life. Understanding your inner drive will help you set realistic goals and actively participate in the therapeutic process. You can do it, put your back into it like Ice Cube said!
4. How do I hold myself accountable and take steps for necessary change in my life?
Going to your sessions is not enough to earn a gold star and your therapist cannot do the work for you. You must be an active participant and committed to the process. Take a look at your life now and consider how you hold yourself accountable. This may be an important topic of discussion to have with your therapist when you begin the journey so that you can receive support in doing so. Beyond the 45 minutes you have with your therapist each week, implementing positive changes in your life outside of therapy sessions depends on you. This self-awareness will empower you to take charge of your life.
5. What comfort do I have with being challenged or confronted about actions and thought processes that don't serve me?
“Who gone check me boo?” Your therapist is! Therapy involves self-reflection and it will require challenging discussions in session. It’s important that you check in with yourself about how comfortable you feel with being confronted about behaviors and thought patterns that may hinder your progress. You should also ask yourself how do you like to receive feedback to ensure that it is constructive and digestible (and no, not under any circumstances should your therapist be cursing you out and getting you together in a way that demonstrates disrespect or inconsideration - We operate with high vibrational energy only over here). Your willingness to embrace discomfort can lead to necessary breakthroughs that contribute to lifelong change.
6. How receptive am I to receiving help?
Closed mouths don’t get fed and closed minds do not receive healing. Being aware of what makes you feel safe enough to accept help is important to determine your willingness to receive the information your therapist is giving you. Reflect on your willingness to engage with and accept support from your therapist. Are you willing to give that meditation a try or to complete that assignment given? Being receptive helps to create a collaborative and empowering therapeutic relationship, which is the number one indicator of success within the therapeutic relationship.
7. How much patience am I willing to give myself on this journey?
Healing takes time, and therapy is a journey, not a destination (read that again). The thoughts and behavioral patterns you currently practice probably took years to build. Give yourself time to deconstruct them — Rome cannot be demolished in a day and neither can some of these patterns that have served to create safety for you. Consider the patience you are willing to extend to yourself as you navigate the ups and downs of personal growth. There will be times where it takes a while for the change to stick and know that that is ok! Developing self-compassion throughout the process of therapy is a key element in fostering lasting change. Reflect on your commitment to long-term growth and resilience in the face of challenges to remind you that YOU GOT THIS!
As much as therapy is designed for everyone, it is important that you have some ability to self-reflect to make this journey as meaningful as possible. That is the master key to your personal growth. I hope that these questions support you recognizing if now is the right time to engage in therapy. And know that if it’s not… It’s completely ok. There are other forms of healing that may be just as beneficial to you at this time. Now that you’ve gotten your answers and you’re ready to move forward, consider enhancing your therapy experience with "My Healing Journey: A Journaling Tool for Your Therapy Experience." Utilizing these questions can help you to determine your commitment to the process which is a unique component to this journal which has been designed to complement your self-discovery process by providing a supportive space for reflection and growth.
Begin your transformative journey today, and embrace the possibilities that lie ahead.
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